In case you don’t know this about me, I also write under the name of Sinclair, and one of my ecourses on submission starts soon.
So lately, I’ve been musing about the stereotypes around submission, particularly that folks who are (or want to be) submissive in bed also do (or must) have submissive, doormat-like personalities.
I find that folks who are new and exploring submission have often told me they fear losing their autonomy, their sense of strength; that they are concerned that they must somehow compromise their integrity or worthiness in order to submit.
But on the contrary, I think the strongest submissives I know, those with many years of experience and who theorize about what it’s like to be in authority exchange or total power exchange relationships, are some of the strongest people I know.
I wrote a thing over on Sugarbutch about this, You can be your strongest self AND be a power bottom.
In it, I talk about my own misconceptions and how I still sometimes fall prey to the way my brain wants to categorize people (totally human nature), and how I believe I’m not sure it’s possible to avoid assumptions, but I can at least keep them to myself.
Do you think more submissives have submissive personalities *and* want to submit in bed, or do they tend to be more dominant personalities? Or are they neither extreme, but more well-balanced personalities?
Maybe it doesn’t matter what the majority is like — but my point is that I want to bust the misconception that submissives all have submissive personalities. You CAN be your strongest self and still be a power bottom. (Click here to read the whole thing over on Sugarbutch.)